Facebook showed me this memory today, a picture of the sunset in Sulac-sur-mer, France.
Oh yeah i remember being on the beautiful and rough Atlantic coast in France.
That was the toughest time of my life on one of the most breathtaking places I’ve ever been.
I remember the girl I was 6 years ago.
Heartbroken and shaken by live deep into my bones.
I didn’t know who I was or what I was here for. I was so scared. Scared to live from the moment I opened my eyes in the morning until I went back into my bed at night. I couldn’t sleep. I was literally paralyzed by fear and hopelessness.
But a fire was burning inside of me – guiding my path.
I remember myself walking through the dunes – alone and for hours – feeling the sand between my toes, smelling wild rosemary and pine and being fully present with myself probably the first time in a long time.
Allowing myself for the first time to talk and grief about the loss of my father 2 years earlier in our small and half shitty rented bungalow with some beers, booze and canned chili.
The campsite was still empty because it wasn’t season yet.
The air was full of silence and salt.
I had just left my job and was about to leave my relationship.
This week in France with my friend was like psychotherapy.
I felt so supported.
I wasn’t alone. She was there and would listen to everything to then tell her own stories which made us both cry like maniacs.
The girl I was 6 years ago is now a shadow.
Honestly: I have no idea how I could survive so much pain and sorrow.
But I want to thank this girl for being so strong, facing her feelings and for finally taking the first baby steps into making me the person I am today.
There are worlds between her and me, and yet we are the same.
I still walk the path she begun to carve and i still feel her heart beating with passion in my chest.
Oh my god, deep down she must have known where we go and i think that’s what kept her up and in motion.
Time to thank her for everything she has done, fought through, recognized, reframed and for following her heart no matter what.
Thank you, Linda with all my heart for everything you’ve done and will do
So maybe now it’s time for YOU to thank yourself, too.
It’s so easy to forget where you have been, who you are now and: who you will be.
She is the same person, has the same heartbeat and her bright future is guiding her here and now.
Thank her for being everything she is. There are no words enough for WHAT she is.
Thank her and feel it in your heart and then go and enjoy this beautiful day knowing that you are always guided by the most divine and closest being you can imagine: yourself.
Your steps today may seem small, even insignificant.
But the truth is much bigger than that.